Hands up


Here we go for another trip down the roller coaster. Our hands thrown up, we finish the long slow climb, teeter at the edge of eternity for just a moment longer, then go barreling down into… Into what? Ah, the joy of the unknown, the thrill of adventure. What loop de loop does God have planned for us next?

A friend of mine shared an interesting thought:

None of this is a surprise to God.

So what will happen next? God truly only knows, and today at least, we will enjoy the ride.

Kevin continues to improve, but we continue to have new obstacles. Last week when Kevin’s liver enzymes had miraculously come down to normal, his bilirubin kept going up. Once the ERCP cleared one of the blockages in his biliary duct and his levels were finally getting under control, his hemoglobin dipped dangerously low. Once a few blood transfusions got those levels up, the bleeding of his tumors increased, requiring platelets to try to stimulate clotting. Low grade fevers persisted which prompted the infectious disease doctors to extend his time on IV antibiotics so that now we’ve been in the hospital for two weeks.

Has it really been two weeks?

It’s a tough one to remember that none of this is a surprise to God. Every day we thought it would be “just a few more days” but we don’t really seem to be getting anywhere.

We did get him out of the hospital today, but only to be transferred to a different one. Not exactly progress. We’re at the Reagan UCLA medical center now, and Interventional Radiology is going to have a look at him in the morning to see if they can get this bleeding under control.

What do you think, God? Then will we be ready to get out? Pretty please? What’s up for us on your schedule next?

I think I can speak for both Kevin and I when I say that this has bar none been the hardest hospitalization we have gone through. But we have also felt closer to each other and to God than we have ever in our lives. Scary and amazing all at the same time.

Kind of like flying down a roller coaster with your hands up, right?

5 thoughts on “Hands up

  1. I just read your blog to my 8th grade Spanish class. You both have no idea what a testimony you are to these young people! They have spent our entire class period writing note cards for you all! I am sending it later this week!

  2. I start each day with the In Touch (www.intouch.org) daily devotion.
    The Daily Devotion for November 05, Tuesday was the following:

    “All of us would like to be remembered as individuals who left a good and lasting imprint on the lives of others. The problem is that we tend to be so self-centered that few of us deeply impact even our closest neighbors.
    How well we succeed in touching the lives of others is usually determined by our character. And ultimately, it is our spiritual impact that our heavenly Father is concerned about.…….
    Salt flavors and preserves food. When we sprinkle it on something flavorless, the food becomes much more enjoyable. We’re to flavor the lives of people around us by using our actions and words to point them to Jesus. …..
    Never forget that you have an influence on others—either for good or for bad. Salt makes a positive difference on whatever comes in contact with it. Because we are followers of Christ, it is our job to flavor the world around us so it will be impacted in positive and God-honoring ways.

    Your blog is doing exactly that, impacted people in a God-honoring ways and touching many of us life.
    We all inspired by your faith, your fight and desperately praying to a “happy end” here on earth, when you too can have your “Quiet Life” and raise up your children.
    That is what I will pray for tonight and every day going forward.

  3. Blessings for you Rachel and your family. Good to meet you at Starbucks in Burbank. I and my church family are praying for you and that the ” spontaneous remission” that is the business of Our Father comes today.

  4. Your story is an amazing testament to your strength in God and family . My dad is going through this horrible disease and I have watched it destroy his body, but not his spirit. God is the only one who know what the future holds, but I hold true to the power of prayer and family. When the time comes, as it will for all of us, I know my dad gave it his best shot. He remains strong and kind ,even in the face of this adversity. He is always trying to make us (6 kids) adults ok. This is the best man I have ever known and maybe that is why this journey is so difficult . He is man who taught love to all! He is a true Irish Angel on earth.! I pray for you Kevin and Rachel, as I do for my dad. The blog has helped me understand the fight against melanoma is a hard battle for a lot of people and we are not alone. The warriors continue until the end. Irish eyes are smiling for us all!!

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